Nein! Nein! Nyet! For I have sinned! For me Lawd Gawd!

1. Don’t hold your phone up to your ear.

I really should slow down and listen for the voice of God. But since my parents are ever present and for the fact that I wear TWO hearing aids, I can’t hear you!

2. Try not to use your phone if you’re in a fast-moving vehicle.

I really should keep both hands on the steering wheel. But I find that I need to ‘changes’ YouTube channels and use Google Maps more often than necessary.

3. Avoid using your phone when you have one or two service bars showing.

Yeah, we I have an unlimited data plan and today at church this evening, I could not access my Yahoo email, despite the LTE power.

4. Don’t carry your phone in your pocket, bra or holster close to your body.

I can’t be hands free without having my phone near me. And I tried a fanny pack but that didn’t work either! So WTF!

5. Never sleep with your phone under your pillow or near your head.

I usually watch XP2 and other YouTube videos prior to drifting off to sleep. And of course a convenient location for my dose of radiation is UNDER my pillow, so I would never have to miss an important phone call.

Categories: flynnspaws

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